Singles Report | Singles news, single websites, personals, dating, and Internet dating trends

Etiquette For Finding Prospective Dates

A common concern within the dating scene is the etiquette that is associated with who you can and cannot date. Of course, you cannot really control who you fall in love with, but there are generally some do's and don'ts that are worth keeping in mind. Though many are obvious, there are some situations that truly have a fine line between whether or not it is suitable to date the individual in question.

For example, if a good friend introduces you to someone for the general purpose of possibly dating them, there's not an actual problem if you develop feelings for that individual. However, what do you do if you're good friends with someone and you find yourself wanting to date someone that they're also very good friends with? Or likewise, what if you want to date someone that your good friend is related to? This is where some boundaries might appear. In situations where everything works out perfectly, of course there would be no issue -- but if you end up breaking up with your friend's relative or breaking the heart of their good friend, it can cause problems within your own friendship.

Another example is etiquette related to dating people in your workplace. Generally, it's never recommended that you should even consider dating someone within your workplace. Not only does it mix your business situations with a personal bias, but it can also risk you losing your job in some scenarios. Though many people tread on thin lines by developing crushes and flirting while at work, you can be certain that this is etiquette that should be heeded and obeyed. Can you think of any other scenarios where etiquette might apply towards finding prospective dates?

Are Dating Websites Right For You?

One method of dating that has become increasingly popular in the past few years has been the use of dating websites. You make a profile that explains all of your interests and what you are looking for in a prospective companion and the dating websites supposedly help by matching you up to people that you would be compatible with. There are numerous websites that are listed on the internet and many people have successfully found their ideal partner via these methods. But are dating sites the best option for you?

I would say that it somewhat depends on the personality of the individual involved. If you are not particularly computer savvy and you have your reservations about the internet, using a dating website is probably not the best match for your own situation. However, if you are seeking to meet people outside of your town or you are just tired of dating amongst the people you commonly meet day to day, you might want to consider using a dating website instead.

Of course, there are precautions associated with dating sites, but that's fairly similar to what you would experience with any public website where you are displaying information about yourself. The key is to not put too many publicly identifiable facts about yourself on the internet in order to help reduce the risk. Likewise, always remember to meet up in a public place and make sure that the person that you are meeting with is who they truly claim to be. If you feel concerned or uncomfortable at any time about meeting up with someone, it's best to either cancel the plans or take some friends along with you.

Meeting People

For some people, one of the major challenges of being single is trying to find and meet people that you may have common interests with. If you are not someone who is active in the social side of your town or city, it can be hard to know where to go to meet other singles in the area. Certainly, it can be embarrassing to join one of those groups that specifically target singles in your town, so it's better to start hanging out at places and meeting new people with your friends.

Think about locations that you would be comfortable hanging out at. If you are not someone who typically goes out to bars or clubbing, you may not have the best results attempting these types of areas on your own. Instead, consider some locations where you enjoy some of your favorite hobbies, such as hiking trails if you're an active hiker. Meeting someone who shares the same interests that you do can help you to relate easier to each other and have a better potential with dating.

Remember that love can always strike in the most unexpected of areas -- it isn't about where you are, it's about who you are with at the time. Many people have successfully met their boyfriend or girlfriend while shopping for groceries, visiting a restaurant, or relaxing at the park. Go to a variety of different places and don't give up if you don't have instant results. Even if you don't meet potential dates, you may meet plenty of new friends that will be able to enrich your life greatly with their own insight.

Making The Most Out Of Being Single

Sometimes being single can be the most exciting and fulfilling time of your life. This isn't to say that being part of a couple has negative connotations -- but rather that when you are single, you have more time to focus on improving yourself as a person, discovering new hobbies, and having fun in your spare time. Without having responsibilities towards spending time with a significant other, you have the opportunity to explore a variety of pathways that can showcase undiscovered skills and talents.

For example, perhaps you're a thrill seeker and love to travel. If you were dating someone, you would have to find an individual that had the same interests - if they don't, they might slow down your pursuit of your own interests. By being single, you have extra time to explore the world, go traveling, and even bungee jump if you have a thrill seeking personality. Although there are many experiences that are all encompassing and better shared with your other half, there are also experiences that are best enjoyed on your own. Dating someone that you are ultimately not compatible with can inhibit your self expression, the exploration of new skills, and the pursuit of your favorite interests.

For the amount of time that almost everyone spends being single, we should learn and encourage the appreciation of this time that we are given to gain more understanding of ourselves. Being single does not have to be a miserable experience - instead, transform it into an opportunity to become the best individual possible.

Being Single isn’t a Bad Thing

I find it interesting being single how people seem to think that being single is a bad thing and that I need to find someone to be with. For instance, I was talking with co-workers today about a trip that I am going on next year and there was a com ment “Oh, it’s too bad you cannot find a guy to go with”. First of all, I do not get why I need to travel with anyone? I have traveled independently before and there are definitely advantages to it, but on the other hand, why do I need a guy to go with me? I am joining a tour so I am not terribly concerned about safety beyond the normal precautions a person should take. A guy is not necessarily any extra protection in a situation and sometimes they are just a hindrance instead of a help.

While there are definitely advantages to having a guy around in situations such as in the airport to supervise your luggage while you go to the washroom, there are definite downsides. In the past, when I have traveled with guys, especially those that I was in a relationship with, I found that I had to babysit them as they just expect you to be like their mom and organize them. A grown man should be able to make sure that he has his passport, his tickets and that he remembered to pack his toothbrush and enough underwear to last the duration of the trip.

How does one Date?

I often wonder these days how a person gets out there and finds someone to date. With people continually becoming more paranoid about safety, how do you actually get out there and meet someone?

People have told me in the pat that I should go to the grocery store to meet a man. Such a cliché! Stand there and check out the fruit and judge a guy based on how he shops. If he buys a lot of instant type food, or single quantities, then he is single and a person should try to pick him up. I find this logic rather flawed as I tend to buy large quantities (like a dozen apples at once) or family size lasagne (these last several days). By this logic, I look like I am shopping for a family when I am not.

Another solution is to ask someone to set me up with someone. Quite frankly, this option scares me. I do not have a lot of friends and they really do not know me to the point that I think they could successfully set me up. I tend to be quite private and the information that I put out there probably is not a really good indicator of what I am looking for. Plus, it is not a discussion I have had with any of my friends for them to really know either. Truth be told, I am not really sure what kind of person I am ultimately looking for either.

Speed Dating

Recently a friend asked me if I have ever tried speed dating. I have to admit that I have not, but that it is something that I have considered. I don’t really know a lot about it but from the bits I have heard, it sounds intriguing and not nearly as painful as a first date.

With speed dating, you meet in a public forum – restaurant, bar – and there are a certain amount of men and women there. How each location organizes it is different but essentially one gender sits at a table and the other gender moves around the room. So Girl A stays at her table all night but when the buzzer/bell dings, Guy A will move from table Girl A to table Girl B and then to table Girl C until he makes his way around the room.

At some point in the evening, the people mark their “scorecard” with which people they would like to meet up with again. If both people select each other – Guy A and Girl E both want to meet again – the organizers will pass the contact information on to both of them. This then leaves the next step up to the two people involved.

The benefit to this method is that if you do not meet anyone who interests you, they do not have your information to contact you in the future. Of course, it goes the other way in that if you are interested in them, but they are not interested in, you cannot contact them.

Dating Websites

There are a lot of different dating websites out there for a person to try and use. Some are free like Plentyoffish.com and others have a subscription where you pay a monthly fee to contact others but they promise better matches. But depending on where you live, there is no great benefit to the pay sites over the other sites as it is all the same people.

Where I live, the population is around 250,000 people, of which I have no clue how many are single and male. But I find when I am on the dating sites I find the same people no matter where I am. Most of the pay sites still give you browsing abilities without the payment but you cannot make contact. Just from the information that is posted or from the profile pictures, you can get a pretty good idea if it is the same person or not.

I have heard in the past from some people that you are not serious about finding that special someone if you are not willing to pay for a dating site but I do not agree with that logic. Why pay for something that you can just go down the street and get for free? It maybe does not look as pretty or give you the same bells and whistles, but it works just as well and you ultimately end up with the same results. Plus, some people are sneaky and in their accounts at the paid places they will list their contact information so that you can get in touch.

Welcome to Singles Report

Discuss the latest singles news and research, or share your favorite singles sites by clicking "Add a Post."